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May 30, 2014
14:19 // 4 months ago
June 23, 2013

A press secretary is a professional question-dodger, right? Well, if that’s the case, check out how good Jay Carney is at his job using this Yahoo News interactive graphic. (via Slate)

16:46 // 1 year ago
January 10, 2012
This is a remarkably harmonious place.
White House Press Secretary Jay Carney, rebutting the new book “The Obamas” • Writer Jodi Kantor’s latest book, “The Obamas,” is all about life inside the White House, with a focus on Michelle Obama’s experiences.  There have been quite a number of critics coming out, claiming that she got a lot wrong. Thanks to BuzzFeed, we learned that (excepting some smaller errors on her part) many of those criticisms haven’t held weight. source (viafollow)
15:43 // 2 years ago
June 9, 2011

Gingrich’s campaign suffers high-level staffer exodus

A bad day for big Newt: Want to know what can’t fill your heart with confidence heading into a Presidential primary? When your press secretary tells the AP he’s resigning, and your campaign manager, along with a spate of aides throughout Iowa, New Hampshire, and South Carolina follow suit. Gingrich has said that he will continue to run, undeterred by this “rats fleeing the sinking ship” sort of moment. As it happens, Gingrich wasn’t even in the country a few days ago — he’s on vacation with his wife near the Greek Isles (which, in the midst of a campaign in such crisis, doesn’t make him seem that serious about all this). source

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15:48 // 3 years ago
March 7, 2011
No options have been removed from the table.
White House Press Secretary Jay Carney, when asked if sending troops was one of the options for military intervention in Libya. Carney added that ground troops was ‘not at the top of the list.’ The press briefing is airing now on CSPAN. (via pantslessprogressive)

(via pantslessprogressive)

12:54 // 3 years ago
January 27, 2011
Who’s this Jay Carney dude? A wasted opportunity, that’s who.
We have no clue who this Jay Carney loser is. But we don’t like him. He looks like a square whose nose doesn’t completely fit on his face. We had a lot of hopes and dreams about helping the Obama administration on its long road towards triangulation, but now, the dream is dead. This loser, who once worked at some lame-ass publication that nobody’s ever heard of called “Time”, used to be Biden’s press secretary before they moved him over to Obama’s job. Had he kept said job, we would’ve been totally cool with him. But, now, Jay, it’s war. You’re about as suited to this job as Jim Varney would’ve been. You guys have phonetically similar names. That’s not a coincidence. Like Mr. Varney, you will be considered a laughingstock in your industry. And we’ll be sitting over here, waiting for you to fall down, ready to gain what is rightfully ours. source
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We have no clue who this Jay Carney loser is. But we don’t like him. He looks like a square whose nose doesn’t completely fit on his face. We had a lot of hopes and dreams about helping the Obama administration on its long road towards triangulation, but now, the dream is dead. This loser, who once worked at some lame-ass publication that nobody’s ever heard of called “Time”, used to be Biden’s press secretary before they moved him over to Obama’s job. Had he kept said job, we would’ve been totally cool with him. But, now, Jay, it’s war. You’re about as suited to this job as Jim Varney would’ve been. You guys have phonetically similar names. That’s not a coincidence. Like Mr. Varney, you will be considered a laughingstock in your industry. And we’ll be sitting over here, waiting for you to fall down, ready to gain what is rightfully ours. source

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18:46 // 3 years ago
January 5, 2011

On our just-appointed Deputy Press Secretary

pantslessprogressive said: As long as I can be your deputy press sec, this sounds like a plan! :-)

» We say: Good idea. We need someone to take the heat off us when we accidentally use the “c” word, David O. Russell-style.

23:41 // 3 years ago
Dear Obama: We’re everything you need in a press secretary

Look, now that Robert Gibbs is leaving you must be taking resumes or something. And before we go about submitting an application to the Obama/Biden beast (and spending hours upon hours updating our resume), we thought it might help to explain what you’d be getting if the ShortFormBlog staff took over the work of Mr. Professional himself, Robert “Obama’s bulldog” Gibbs. We can’t expect to be everything for you that he was, but we do have a lot of unique qualifications, including:
We like complaining! We notice that your administration doesn’t know when to complain about the right’s withering attacks on your character, on your policies, on your place of birth, on how ugly Bo is, on how much money Michelle spent on that trip to Spain, etc., etc. … God, can you give us a break? This job is really hard and we’re trying to save you from yourselves!
Blurby Press releases The Obama administration has had many PR innovations in its first two years in office – an open-source Web backend, a hugely-popular Twitter account, an entertaining Flickr account … but you’re missing something. You need press releases with giant numbers, profanity and myriad obscure pop-culture references. We can offer that.
The press will be putty Look … between CNN, Fox News, NBC, the other networks … they’ll all ask really tough questions and we’ll evade them by using the Socratic method. Sample dialogue: Them – "Why was Obama golfing during the oil spill?" Us – “Why do you care? You’re annoying and nobody watches your channel anyway, CNN.” Yeah, we’re good.
» So, what do you say, brah? We’re available to work immediately, and your organization could use someone like us. We’d make things interesting, because we know how drab the White House gets when there’s no change. We can be that change you promised, Barack.
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Look, now that Robert Gibbs is leaving you must be taking resumes or something. And before we go about submitting an application to the Obama/Biden beast (and spending hours upon hours updating our resume), we thought it might help to explain what you’d be getting if the ShortFormBlog staff took over the work of Mr. Professional himself, Robert “Obama’s bulldog” Gibbs. We can’t expect to be everything for you that he was, but we do have a lot of unique qualifications, including:

  • We like complaining! We notice that your administration doesn’t know when to complain about the right’s withering attacks on your character, on your policies, on your place of birth, on how ugly Bo is, on how much money Michelle spent on that trip to Spain, etc., etc. … God, can you give us a break? This job is really hard and we’re trying to save you from yourselves!
  • Blurby Press releases The Obama administration has had many PR innovations in its first two years in office – an open-source Web backend, a hugely-popular Twitter account, an entertaining Flickr account … but you’re missing something. You need press releases with giant numbers, profanity and myriad obscure pop-culture references. We can offer that.
  • The press will be putty Look … between CNN, Fox News, NBC, the other networks … they’ll all ask really tough questions and we’ll evade them by using the Socratic method. Sample dialogue: Them – "Why was Obama golfing during the oil spill?" Us – “Why do you care? You’re annoying and nobody watches your channel anyway, CNN.” Yeah, we’re good.

» So, what do you say, brah? We’re available to work immediately, and your organization could use someone like us. We’d make things interesting, because we know how drab the White House gets when there’s no change. We can be that change you promised, Barack.

Follow ShortFormBlog

23:25 // 3 years ago
The best service I can provide this president is, for the next couple of years, outside this building.
Obama Press Secretary Robert Gibbs • Explaining his reasoning for leaving the warm confines of the White House. Essentially, he won’t be working for Obama inside of the press room, but on the public circuit, where he can show off his feisty nature a bit more freely. It says a lot about Obama’s presidency that two of his top three first-term guys in the White House will still play major roles in his second term – even if it’s not inside the stoic walls of the White House itself. His lead confidantes are mostly loyal. source (viafollow)
22:36 // 3 years ago
Sigh: Robert Gibbs stepping down as Obama’s press secretary
You know, we like Robert Gibbs. Endlessly entertaining, more willing to make waves than any other recent press secretary, and a great fit for Obama. He’s feisty where Obama is measured. He isn’t a mouthpiece. He’s a contributor and played a huge role in Obama’s first two years. And that’s why, even though he’s leaving as press secretary in February, he’s still likely to play a role in Obama’s future campaigns. We salute you, Robert Gibbs. You make Scott McClellan look like the straight-up mouthpiece he was. source
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You know, we like Robert Gibbs. Endlessly entertaining, more willing to make waves than any other recent press secretary, and a great fit for Obama. He’s feisty where Obama is measured. He isn’t a mouthpiece. He’s a contributor and played a huge role in Obama’s first two years. And that’s why, even though he’s leaving as press secretary in February, he’s still likely to play a role in Obama’s future campaigns. We salute you, Robert Gibbs. You make Scott McClellan look like the straight-up mouthpiece he was. source

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10:26 // 3 years ago