The Big Chill. Kim Jong-Il’s funeral includes lots of snow, synchronized mourning, a blink-and-you-missed-it funeral procession and a repeated tower block. [Follow]
I think everyone should take a moment today to be thankful they don’t live in North Korea. I feel horrible for the people who do, a sentiment that sadly only emerges on the rare occasion I glimpse into the bleak, dismal hellhole they call home. These sad, manipulated, tortured people deserve so much better than the world they know and a leadership that obviously sees them as little more than props on the geopolitical stage.
This is certainly not a high point for humanity tonight. In fact, it’s beyond explanation. It’s like reality TV, except without the TV conventions to ensure what you’re seeing isn’t actually real. And even then, some of this is probably fake (there’s evidence of repeating footage, and the crying certainly sounds monotonous).
We’re not sure what to make of all this, but we think a few people on Twitter have gotten close:
The overwrought crying at the Kim Jong-Il funeral looks like a Beatles concert, circa 1964
— Anthony De Rosa (@AntDeRosa) December 28, 2011
@AntDeRosa The overwrought crying at the Kim Jong-Il funeral looks like the #MichaelJackson Bad Tour. Fainting soon to follow
— Mark Anthony Thomas (@workandprogress) December 28, 2011
The Kim Jong-Il funeral is grim to the point of parody. There’s just one emotion on display and it is EXTREMELY SAD: bit.ly/rsBugI
— Chris Boutet (@chrisboutet) December 28, 2011
The images being broadcast from the Kim Jong-Il funeral is Orwell’s 1984 coming to life. It’s beyond surreal.
— Richard Deitsch (@richarddeitsch) December 28, 2011
I bet North Korea has set the world record of the most people crying at the same time. #NorthKorea
— Takashi D. Merken(@Takashiwolf) December 28, 2011
The videos from last week were no joke. There is a LOT of crying in this funeral clip. A LOT, from the announcer on down. Good luck trying to parse this, Americans.
Have nothing better to do right now? May we suggest watching Kim Jong-Il’s funeral, happening right now and streaming live online? Because, let’s face it, when’s the next time you’re going to be able to say, “I watched a notorious world leader’s funeral — live”?
North Korean state media: Jimmy Carter offered condolences: For some reason, right-leaning blogs and news sites are obsessed with this story. Mind you, this is also the same North Korean media which has been using extremely figurative language to describe Dear Leader’s death. source
He will, however, share power with his uncle … at first. Just before the death of his father was announced Monday, Kim Jong-Un issued his first military order. He told all members of the North Korean military to quit their training exercises and return to their bases. This is a biggish deal because South Korean officials didn’t actually think he was in complete control of the military. Meanwhile, as the country currently has no military strongman, it’s likely that Kim will share power with Jang Song-thaek, the brother-in-law of Kim Jong-Il, and the North Korean military. It’ll be interesting to see what changes in the country’s dynamic after this. source
Does that count as irony? Nicholas Kristof’s fb update…
The mark of the humble brag rises again.
And for the “unlucky” North Koreans: This is an interview with Dong Hyuk Shin, a 26-year-old North Korean who was born in—and escaped—one of the country’s concentration camps. In North Korea, if you’re accused of political dissent (which includes, for example, sitting on a picture of Kim Jong-Il), you and three generations of your family are thrown into a gulag. So if, like Shin, your mother is accused of opposing the regime, and she gets pregnant in the camp, you’ll be born there, and that’s where you’ll stay for your entire existence. Unless, like Shin, you manage to escape. This is a long video (Shin himself starts at about 21:00), but we guarantee your eyes will not be dry by the end. Oh, and here’s a New York Times article with more information on the DPRK’s prison camps, if you care to read more.
If a funeral takes place during the day and the burial is performed that evening, the grave may be dug open and the body stolen before morning. Such incidents happen often. The stolen body is cut into pieces and sold on the black market…the dead bodies lose freshness overnight, which makes it difficult to market them.A North Korean refugee, regarding the sale of human flesh in his country. North Korea is a hellhole for most of its (non-enlisted) citizens, thanks to Kim Jon-Il and his late father, Kim Il-Sung. Practices such as the one described above take place in amongst North Korea’s “lucky” citizens—that is, those who have managed to avoid being locked up in forced labor camps, a topic we’ll have more on later. More on North Korean cannibalism here.
Poll of the day: On the death of Kim Jong-Il and the prospects of future freedoms for a notoriously restricted population. Vote. Share. Leave a comment. (Like this poll? Let us know. We’re thinking about doing daily Quipols as a standing feature.)